By Popular Demand (& My Mom) ...

You know how you love getting comments on your Facebook status updates? Well, I found that it was my updates involving my youngest son, 3-year-old Max, that were getting the most action, as it were. (What, no one cares about my bad hair days???) So, here you go, your instant resource of little person musings....& if you have a budding philosopher (or comedian) of your own, send their insights my way & I'll post them for all to enjoy!

Friday, April 23, 2010

Max on lunch?

Me to Max: "Hey, how 'bout we go to Quizno's for lunch?" Max: "Eww..I don't like kids' noses...they have boogers."

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Max & the Babysitter:

When we came home from our date night tonight, Max insisted on "writing" a note to their babysitter (a 6th grade girl)--"Is she your friend?" I asked. Max: "No." Me: "No? You don't like her?" Max: "No. I love her."

Max on Church:

"I love Jesus but I don't like going to have to wait so long before you can get donuts."

Friday, April 2, 2010

Max on monsters:

At bedtime last night, his brother and roommate was not there and so he was afraid to be alone. Max asked, "Mom, are monsters real?"
Me: "No, they're not. Um, but y'know there are wild animals like in the jungle or there can be bad people."
Max: "Like dogcatchers?"

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Um, what are you feeding this kid??

The running commentary on the way home from preschool (where Max got plastic Easter eggs filled with jelly beans):

Opening up an egg carefully: "Nice and easy, boys. Nice and easy."

"Mom, the purple ones taste like strawberries, yeah. And the pink ones taste like M & M's. Oh, and the black ones taste like Starbucks! The blue ones taste like beer, yeah."

Jelly Belly Co.-- We've got some new flavors for ya!

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

1st Grade Grammar:

A conversation between my friend and her 1st grade daughter:
Mama: "Why are you bringing your Angel Reader to school?"

Lainie:  "Because we are studying contraptions at school and this book has them."

Mama: "What? There are contraptions in your book?"

Lainie: "Yup, you know: 'it's, don't, can't' -- CON-TRAP-TIONS!"

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Independent Max:

T-shirt in hand, Max jumped on the bed waking me up this morning. "I'm going to put this on all by myself!" Serious pause: "Oh, I hope this works!"

Monday, March 29, 2010

On the Allure of Sugar Cookies

This is from our 7 year old neighbor Ryan:

"Hello sugar cookies.  Remember me? 
I'm your Love."
After his lunch, his mom told him 
he could have a cookie... 
He walked over to the box of cookies and goes, 
"Hello Gorgeous." 

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Max on money:

"I want a purse. I need to protect my money. I like money."

And to demonstrate his like for money, this morning at church Max slam-dunked his donation into the collection basket almost knocking over the usher. That usher wins the "best grip" award.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Palm Sunday according to Maddie (Max's 6 yr. old sister):

"Once upon a time, Jesus was riding on a donkey. The road was really bumpy. The disciples didn't want Jesus to be bumply. So, they laid down palm trees."

Independent Max:

Bottle in hand, Max proudly woke me up this morning: "I poured it myself. My brain was hungry." Did you spill any? "Yeah, but I cleaned it up." All of it? "No--it was a mess!"

Friday, March 26, 2010

So, what are you trying to say??

Max was rummaging in my purse (looking for gum no doubt), pulled out the booklet of the U.S. Constitution that I keep there & handed it to me saying, "You need to read this Mom!"

Max on geography:

The Knighted States of Merica is my favorite country. (Why?) Because I have a sandbox. Yeah. & Can-a-da (Why?) Because I want milk. Yeah. & the flag with green, white & orange. (Ireland?) Yeah. Ire-land. Is that in Mary-land?

Max recognizes greatness:

After mass today Max pointed at our priest & said to him, "God, you're the greatest!" Our priest, looking a little embarrassed, said, "I'm not God, but uh, thanks!"

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Max on God's way:

Me to Max: "How was school today?" Max: "Some kids didn't go God's way." Me: "And what is God's way?" Max: "It's the Promised Land. You have to go by sailboat because there are sharks in the water." Yes, Max, there are.

Max on hygiene:

Me to Max: *sniff* "Do you have a poopie?" Max:"Yes" Me: "Ok, let's go, I need to go change you." Max: "I think you're overreacting."

Max on preschool:

  "I don't want to go to school. It's not fun enough. It needs more puppies."

Max while watching Olympic figure skating:

 "I can do that." "I can't do that." "I can do that."

Max's recipe for hot chocolate:

Empty 3 mix packets (with marshmallows) into a mug, do NOT add any liquid. Place a metal spoon into the mug. Put mug in the microwave & hit the "Popcorn" button. Move out of the way as Mom lunges for the microwave.